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the evolution archive

sony and the goat

Like most people with a conscience — even one as addled as mine by alcohol, Dungeons & Dragons, video games, and relationship failures — I was outraged when I read the popular account of Sony’s promotion of its new game God of War II, which went a little something like this:

Electronics giant Sony has sparked a major row over animal cruelty and the ethics of the computer industry by using a freshly slaughtered goat to promote a violent video game.

The corpse of the decapitated animal was the centrepiece of a party to celebrate the launch of the God Of War II game for the company’s PlayStation 2 console.

Guests at the event were even invited to reach inside the goat’s still-warm carcass to eat offal from its stomach.

Sickening images of the party have appeared in the company’s official PlayStation magazine – but after being contacted by The Mail on Sunday, Sony issued an apology for the gruesome stunt and promised to recall the entire print run.

Critics condemned the entertainment giant, which produces scores of Hollywood blockbusters each year, for its “blood lust” and said the grotesque “sacrifice” highlighted increasing concerns over the content of video games and the lengths to which the industry will go to exploit youngsters.

At the event, guests competed to see who could eat the most offal – procured elsewhere and intended to resemble the goat’s intestines – from its stomach.

They also threw knives at targets and pulled live snakes from a pit with their bare hands.

Topless girls added to the louche atmosphere by dipping grapes into guests’ mouths, while a male model portraying Kratos, the game’s warrior hero, handed out garlands.

Kotaku, Nick Denton’s gaming-yap blog, solicited comment from Sony’s people, which paints a milder picture — they bought the goat from a butcher. Also, they claim that the article above was written by someone not in attendance.

Still, I’d like to thank Sony for giving busybody dumbasses like Jack Thompson an extra ten years of things to do to try to destroy videogaming as a form of entertainment.

I liked games more before hipsters and marketing got involved…

UPDATE: This wire story fills in some gaps.

Sony hosted about 20 journalists at the March 1 event, which it called a theatrical dramatization with a Greek mythological theme. The goat, provided to the production company by a local butcher, was part of the set dressing, the company said.

The U.K.’s Daily Mail newspaper on Sunday published a story on the party, where female hostesses with breasts covered with nothing but body paint fed grapes to guests, who competed to eat the most “warm entrails” — a meat soup made to look like the goat’s internal organs.

Thanks again, dickheads.

marginalia

» My host has been having problems today, so this site’s availability will be hit-or-miss for a day or two. My apologies. UPDATE [22:15]: I just learned that my host’s server is undergoing upgrades. Looks like it’s over now.

» This just in — I hate my upstairs neighbors. The latest outrage: sweeping bird seed directly through the slats of their deck onto my head and in my laptop keyboard, as I was clearly seated beneath them.

search terms!

People are starting to come back to this site, so I thought I’d help some of you Googlers out who are popping in now and again. The following are actual search phrases used to reach this site (with ranking):

  • im sick of this shit — Me too. (Not in the top 100.)
  • poems on my lust for you — Poems don’t really work for lust. Or so I’ve found. (Google #4)
  • elin grindemyr fake or realI vote real (Link NSFW — not in top 100).
  • purity ceremonies for single adults — Let me get you a towel. Or, if you prefer, a dirty sock. (Not in top 100 — Disturbingly, this search generated 375,000 results)
  • kansas political blogs — Google #10, baby.

Man, you people are jacked.

japan: prospective poodle purchasers plunk pounds for lambs instead (UPDATED: hoax?)

Some Japanese folks, who apparently have day jobs as fucking idiots, were suckered by someone selling neatly-trimmed lambs as “poodles”. The UK Metro includes a helpful comparison, which I have embellished to help our friends from the Land of the Rising Sun:

poodle?

Entire flocks of lambs were shipped over from the UK and Australia to Japan by an internet company and marketed as the latest ‘must have’ accessory.

But the scam was only spotted after a leading Japanese actress said her ‘poodle’ didn’t bark and refused to eat dog food.

Maiko Kawakami, who starred in the Japanese thriller Violent Cop, showed photographs of her pet on a television talk show only to be told it wasn’t a dog – but was in fact a lamb.

The article goes on to politely excuse this mistake by saying that poodles are “extremely rare” in Japan. They’ve seen dogs though, right?

UPDATE [27 Apr 20:41] Damn — Snopes says it’s a hoax.

tourist attraction in china: city of dominatrices

Sounds hot:

The motto of the new town would be “women never make mistakes, and men can never refuse women’s requests,” Chinese media have reported.

When tour groups enter the town, female tourists would play the dominant role when shopping or choosing a place to stay, and a disobedient man would be punished by “kneeling on an uneven board” or washing dishes in restaurant, media reports said.

Thank you, ma’am, may I have another?

bet those red-state chimp-bots don’t sound so bad now, do they

A warrant for Richard Gere’s arrest has been issued in India, where he surprised Indian super-hottie Shilpa Shetty (if you want to see what I’m talking about, click here — SFW but annoying music) with kisses on the cheek. He is being charged with public obscenity.

For her part, Shilpa wasn’t impressed with Gere, but basically told everybody to get over it.

Commenters who make jokes about gerbils or hamsters will be joined in laughter shot on sight.

hawking rides vomit comet

With a retinue of doctors. And hot naughty nurses, no doubt.

dr. strangehawk

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