more on g4
A while back I wrote about the merger of two cable channels — TechTV, a channel dedicated to computers and computing technology, and G4, a channel dedicated to video games. I wrote then that fans of TechTV who were dissatisfied with G4 needed to calm down, have a nice glass of iced tea, and think things over in a rational manner.
I saw something today, however, that made me spit up my iced tea and join the side of the TechTV fans who hate G4.
I used to love G4, before the merger. It had witty original programming by gaming nerds for gaming nerds, and charmingly bad production values. (TechTV’s production values, by the way, were no better.) You’ll find out more if you follow the link back into the evolution archives. Also, I had problems with some of the game reviewers, who only gave games high ratings when they contained skaters and/or pus-bloated zombies.
There are two new G4 shows, however, that have turned me against the network forever: Formula D and Street Fury. Quite obviously directed at the zit-covered lamebrains you see at the mall — you know, the ones with sweatbands and shirts with dragons/flames on them, the ones that look like a cross between Nelly, the hood of a 1978 Pontiac Firebird, and a bad airbrushed license plate that you have on the piece of shit you drove in high school — these shows feature the world of “import car racing.”
For those of you unfamiliar with this activity, let me explain the niceties of “import car racing” to you. At its core, it entails affixing a number of gaudy and non-performance enhancing items to your Acura/Honda/Toyota. These include but are not limited to the following: 5″-diameter tailpipe extensions, horrid-looking wheels with independently-moving parts, undercarriage lights; and a God-awful-looking”wing” on the back, which is something like a Formula 1-style spoiler, except not as… good. To complete the look, a number of stickers are added with the names of various auto-parts companies whose parts are not on the car, as well as nonsense Chinese characters. The basic result of all this is that we get to look at an automobile that looks like a Spencer’s gift shop and sounds like my garbage disposal. I’ve since learned that these people are called “ricers.”
Why G4 felt it needed to trade its intelligent audience (people like me, nerds with jobs, no girlfriends/wives, and money as well as the predisposition to buy tons of video games) for these people (no job, parents pay for all the car crap) is beyond me. They have, however, and I will be tuning the channel to one of my two hundred other choices in the future.
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